Saturday, September 8, 2012

Remembering Maxwell | Feeling Out of Sorts

I've been feeling out of sorts lately. Sadness, anger...moments of self-doubt. I've come to realize there are times I wallow in self-pity. Two things help keep me grounded: my husband and my pets. My husband reminds me that I'm one half of a partnership. When I feel down it affects my partner; and vice versa. I can turn to him for comfort and advice instead of bottling things up inside. My pets keep me connected to the day to day, a routine and practical needs (food, water, potty), as well as providing me with companionship and furry loving. 

It's times like these I really miss Maxwell. He was my buddy. Andy has a very different personality, granted, at 9 months old he's still a puppy and growing into himself. We're still very much in the "parent/child" phase and have yet to reach the "parent/child/friends" stage. I'm still constantly having to tell Andy to calm down, to stop biting, to submit to me. Patience is key. I love the pup and know we have a lot to work on. We'll get there. With time Andy and I will be buddies as well.

I'm still mourning Maxwell's passing. It's been 7 months but sometimes it feels like he was with us only yesterday. The last month of his life was rough. It was basically hospice - he was dying and we did what we could to make what time we had left with him comfortable. I'll write about it some day. I'm not ready yet. They say time heals all wounds. I wonder if it really does. Time. Time is what I need. I feel better all ready.

No comments:

Post a Comment